Learn from the mistakes of others

over the past few weeks i have discovered friends i wasn't sure i had. i've dissapointed a few who hoped for more. i rediscovered the joy of simply being alive.

this year i've chosen the law. i am uncertain about whether i'll have a job in a month. it's a bit of a dampner on things at the moment. i'd like to think that i trust that i will still be a lawyer in government in the years to come, but part of me is too scared of being let down again.

a few months ago, i had a friend committed to an institution. last week i had to fight to get another into the same place. i ran into the former in a bottle shop recently, and he seemed ok. alchohol accentuates his difficulties, but i'm not his keeper. the latter is bipolar, schizoid, and ocd. she has problems with reality in all its manifestations. somehow, this guy she met in a few tutorials is the one she trusts most to look out for her when her life hits the wall. i've at least met her family i guess.

people seem to find it easy to confide in me. to talk to me, and share. which is very nice sometimes. other times, very awkward. the things i know ... about certain people ...

i've rediscovered the joy of the shopping spree. i have some very nice new clothes now. and other things. but i've spent all the money i was supposed to be saving.


am i the only one who is blind to the connections between myself and the world/universe? i those between others, for others, so very clearly. but for myself ...

perhaps i have to find my way to trusting that i can. or something.



i still hope for a happy ending. and a happy middling. and perhaps a happy real-soon-now as well.



neutiquam erro.

over the past few weeks i have discovered friends i wasn't sure i had. i've dissapointed a few who hoped for more. i rediscovered the joy of simply being alive.

this year i've chosen the law. i am uncertain about whether i'll have a job in a month. it's a bit of a dampner on things at the moment. i'd like to think that i trust that i will still be a lawyer in government in the years to come, but part of me is too scared of being let down again.

a few months ago, i had a friend committed to an institution. last week i had to fight to get another into the same place. i ran into the former in a bottle shop recently, and he seemed ok. alchohol accentuates his difficulties, but i'm not his keeper. the latter is bipolar, schizoid, and ocd. she has problems with reality in all its manifestations. somehow, this guy she met in a few tutorials is the one she trusts most to look out for her when her life hits the wall. i've at least met her family i guess.

people seem to find it easy to confide in me. to talk to me, and share. which is very nice sometimes. other times, very awkward. the things i know ... about certain people ...

i've rediscovered the joy of the shopping spree. i have some very nice new clothes now. and other things. but i've spent all the money i was supposed to be saving.


am i the only one who is blind to the connections between myself and the world/universe? i those between others, for others, so very clearly. but for myself ...

perhaps i have to find my way to trusting that i can. or something.



i still hope for a happy ending. and a happy middling. and perhaps a happy real-soon-now as well.



neutiquam erro.